A year ago today we found out I was pregnant.
It was a Sunday and Josh and I had spent the whole day together like we normally did on weekends. I can't remember what we did that day. We had spent Saturday night with my family and friends of the family for my mom's 50th birthday celebration. We had been spending about a month looking for an apartment so that we could finally start our lives living together. I was living with my parents from my move up from Florida and he was living with our friends Kristen and Jesse.
I had driven home after our day together and just felt real weird. I decided to stop by Walgreens and buy a pregnancy test. I had done this before usually with a negative to tell me that maybe I was just worn out and making things up in my head. This time it was different. I just had this feeling. I went back to my house and went in the bathroom with the test. Both lines came up. I started crying. I called in my little sister to look at the test because I just couldn't believe my eyes. She confirmed it for me. I cried and cried sitting on the lid of the toilet for quite some time. I couldn't believe it. We weren't even living together yet and I was living at home. I knew that we weren't ready for a child.
I drove from my house back to his house...with the test in a bag. I decided to leave the test in the car since that was kind of gross. But I knocked and tried to not show that I had been crying. I told him I had to talk to him alone. We went into his room and I just started to cry, he just looked at me and I finally just blurted "i'm pregnant"
He hugged me and told me that we would be ok and that he loved me. We sat and talked about what we were going to do. We knew we loved each other. I knew that no matter what I was having this baby. It was made from our love....there was no other option to me. I know that Josh was scared. He was finally getting his child support squared away for his son. He felt like there was no way he could take care of another child. We were both excited but real worried about how we would do this.
We sat there and just held each other for hours. I cried. I of course had to go home and just keep quiet. We figured we would wait until I moved out for us to tell everyone, even though that would be hard with me not lifting quite as much.
Neither of us could imagine what our first doctor visit would reveal! About a week later I had been feeling just awful and we decided to go to the doctor. I was so worried that something was wrong with our baby. Josh saw on the screen before I did. Finally the tech said it out loud. You're having twins!!!!!

I have found my purpose in life. These little boys are my purpose, they are my everything.
I'm so glad that I waited until this point in my life to have kids. They weren't planned but were definitely wanted. I wanted these boys with all of my heart. Joshua is my love and I am so happy that we get to share this. It came a lot faster than we had imagined.....I wanted to be married first. But things happen for a reason.
I couldn't imagine it going any other way.